Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
