what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
