Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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