Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize
