no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize