No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
