Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
