you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
