I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
