you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
