Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
