you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
