hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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