I've blown a few things in my day
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
