Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
