pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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