I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
