dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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