connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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