okay pat passed out under dana's car
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
tell me about the eggs
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