so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize