Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
