do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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