Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
