they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
