i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize