like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
