i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
dude i'm inner monologue high
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
