so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
