i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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