check it out our google latitudes are spooning
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
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