Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
