reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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