New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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