i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize