Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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