She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
