then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Randomize
