My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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