i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
