I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
