Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
