i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Randomize
