Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
my shit smells like andre
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
And then my night got REAL pukey
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
