He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
