What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Sext me about skeletons
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
