You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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