Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Randomize
