He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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