i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
