How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
